Monday, November 22, 2010

Sephardim vote to make Flatbush Judenrein

Sephardim vote to make Flatbush Judenrein

By Rabbi Lamech Somayach Meshumad Meshubach
Masgiach Ruchini
Yeshiva Aishes Eish HaTorah
Special to

A new war has been declared in Flatbush, but this one is not between the gentile ethnicities and the Jews. This war is between the Syrians and the Ashkenazi Jewish groups living in Brooklyn. The opening salvo began when the Syrians expanded their exclusion of converts to exclude Ashkenazi Jews.

German is not a Jewish language and all other Jews had no Jewish roots, the grand mufti declared on Wednesday. He further declared he wanted the area Jeudenrein, adopting the German term for an area that has been ethnically cleansed of Jewish people speaking German.

“Flatbush was given to us and not to them,” declared Fred Shakirge, the chief rabbi and grand mufti of the diaspora Syrian Jewish community. He went on to compare the Ashkenazi confusion of Poland with the term Po – Len, here to them, in Hebrew. Flatbush has a similar meaning in the Syrian dialect of Farsi that an Ashkenazi Jew would never know.

“We want these Kuzaris out of here,” Shakirge said. “It is declared in the Talmud how mass conversions will bring a curse on the Jewish people. The results are self-evident when we have fools walking around in the summer heat wearing heavy wool outfits and fur hats as if they were in the coldest Siberian winter.”

The contempt Shakirge expresed for white Jews was not constrained to inappropriate clothing choices, he also attacked ridiculous chumra like a prohibition on rice based on flour bags being used for rice in a previous century.

“The core of the problem with them [Askenazis] is that they are using superficial aspects of the religion to afflict people in ridiculous ways. We find a single issue, completely torment people on the one point and they can do what they want the rest of the time,” he said.

“After the movie Syriana came out, we knew Syrian Jews have a special connection to the elite ruling class in America. We have what they want,” Shakirge said. “The people in the movie they have oil, but that is nothing compared with Syrians being the chosen people.”

Sebi Lenihan, a professor of Jewish history at Carnegie Melon university agreed, offering supporting evidence commonly known from history. “After their expulsion from Yemen in 1948 we found the Jews from that region were speaking the language of King Solomon, living as itinerant sheepherders, peeing in latrines and they all had direct lineage to the King. The closest King these other Jews can claim connection to is in the 60's they were marching with Martin Luther King. Not quite the same thing.”

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Review of Masbia Soup Kitchen


By Rabbi Lamech Somayach Meshumad Meshubach
Mashgiach Ruchin, Yeshiva Aishes Eish Hatorah
Special to

Any reader of food porn in NYC knows that soup kitchens exist to provide sustenance to prevent the lowest rung of society from starving, then rising up to reconquer the ruling class, until now. The opening of Masbia soup kitchens in Boro Park, Williamsburgh and Midwood feed patrons with a level of luxury rarely experienced at any price, and until now, never for free.

The culinary experience is never just the food. The experience, the atmosphere and the staff can make medium food great and can bring a fabulous meal from the peak of quality to the depths of mediocrity. Masbia excels on both accounts. Unlike other religious groups that subject hungry people to long lectures of questionable logic before they are allowed to eat, Masbia only requires one to sign in and take a seat at a table by oneself. Then the staff brings out the delicious entree of the day, usually chicken leg quarters with barley soup and farfel.

At many restaurants it would be considered a problem to have the same menu for every day of the week for years on end, but not in an Orthodox Jewish restaurant. The reasoning is only logical to a person involved in that religion.

“We never want to change anything,” Said Moshe, the Kollel Jungerman who is beginning to explore the world of work by volunteering at Masbia. At the ripe age of 28 he now has his first part-time job.
“The ancient world treated women badly, so do we. The rabbis in post world war two had chicken and chulent every single week, so do we. The ancient progenitors of Judaism worshipped idols and we have photos of rabbis on the walls of our homes and synagogues. Therefore we have had the same menu every day for three years running.”

The restaurant doesn't resemble a soup kitchen in another way, it is decked out as if it were a fancy restaurant, with subdued lighting, formal behavior and waiters who bring the patrons dinner, bottles of seltzer water and the ubiquitous plate of NY pickles and sauerkraut. Instead of a mechitza dividing between the various patrons and genders eating at the restaurant, there are potted rubber plants, so it barely looks like there is a divider, it merely resembles a poor job of decorating.

However one Orthodox tradition is still very strong in this restaurant, as became obvious when this reviewer ate at the Masbia on Coney Island Avenue. A Jewish woman came in to eat because she was poor. She got her food, and an earful as the manager refused to stop berating her for the entire meal because she came to eat wearing pants. It seems that even free food comes with a price that must be extracted, whether it is in blood, flesh or money.

And this brings up the underlying fault of an enterprise of this nature. In it's essence it is communism at the worst form. The wealthy business owners of Boro Park skim millions off the Jewish community and the people of greater New York and in return they give pack pennies in the form of free food to those willing to undergo humiliation and dress a certain way for it. Then they boast they are not the only ones living well, look at this store they set up to help the people living like them, but without the money. The deepest irony is using all the money to have very large families and then neglecting the children and sending them off to me molested by yeshiva rabbis.

This deception of inequality is the root of the problem. Here exists a group of extremely wealthy individuals ignoring the extreme hardship they are causing in the people around them, or laughing at it and justifying the inequality by humiliation, and using it as a tool of indoctrination to further enslave those around them it is no longer charity. It is just another cog in the giant Orthodox propaganda machine that serves to increase the workforce of people willing to accept less pay and health benefits so the wealthy business owners can earn even more outsize profits. Why, you may ask? Because it says so somewhere in the bible, even though nobody can figure out where, because the bible never says any of that.

Yes the biggest Baal Tzedakah of Monsey sucks his fortune out of the community by way of renting commercial real estate at top dollar, causing the Jewish retailers to charge top dollar. The biggest fraudster sold treif chickens as kosher and still gives his weekly Torah lecture, only now he is retired in Jerusalem instead of Monsey.

Orthodox Judaism is a giant Ponzi scheme justified by the phrase, you just don't understand, yet. The charity is really a form of wealth transfer business, supporting people who provide “services” to the poor. But if a person is really hungry and happens to own the right type of hat or Yarmulke, it's not such bad place to boost your triglyceride fat levels for a few hours.

The casualty on your heart arteries is worse than a pogrom the National Socialist Workers Party would envy, and it won't leave you all constipated the way Passover Matzoh will. But the propaganda value would make Joesph Goebbels proud.